I Love You Because {2013}

When the opportunity arose for me to adopt an incredibly fun and cute tradition from an incredibly fun and cute friend, I jumped at the chance. She came up with "I Love You Because" frames that enable and encourage you to write sweet little love notes to your family. Brilliant. And cute. We have them framed on the wall where you enter the house from the garage. I write Brandon's, he writes mine and we share the kids'. I've tried to be vigilant about updating them often (we got them well into the year) but will try to be better in 2014. (You can buy the digital prints HERE.)

I compiled the lists here so we could remember them. Keep in mind that a) Mason was only around for November and December, so he's slightly underrepresented and b) we don't take ourselves too seriously, so some of them aren't as mushy as you might hope, but it doesn't mean we love eachother any less than couples who spout poetry and pledge their undying love on social media.

BRANDON: I love you because...

• you don't complain when I ask you to do things
• you make me want to be better
• you take a walk at 10 PM to check on something "I just had a feeling about" 
• you can ALWAYS make me laugh
• you pick up my slack...and the neighbour's drawers
• you put up with my hoarding
• you remind me so much of Katniss (after taking a personality quiz and being compared to the heroine of the Hungers Games trilogy)
• you can reach the top shelf

MICHELLE: I love you because...

• you make me enchiladas
• you let me sleep all night when Teagan was sick 
• you're hot 
• you stay up late to make our house clean
• you snort when you laugh
• you add "U's" to words like coloUr and favoUrite
• you're so talented
• you remind me of Effie Trinkett (another Hunger Games personality quiz reference)
• you pretend to like action movies

TEAGAN: I love you because...

• you sleep in (for the record, this one no longer applies)
• you sing so sweetly
• you're so smart
• you make me laugh
• you help Mason find his binky
• you talk like a Munchkin
• you "help" me cook

MASON: I love you because...

• you make funny noises
• you have sweet, sweet hair
• you have fat cheeks

Like I said, I hope to be better about updating them in 2014 because it's been a really sweet exercise for our family. We say "I love you" a lot, which is wonderful, but this idea makes us think of specific reasons why and who doesn't love a little love note every now and again?

Merry CHRISTmas indeed.

A family sleepover is one of the Christmas activities I've seen friends do and though it would be fun to do. Next year. It wasn't under the tree, it wasn't planned and it was a bit of a nightmare. Mason was in his rocker by the side of the bed, Buddy and I were teetering on our respective sides and Teagan slept like a starfish in the middle. She slept so comfortably, in fact, that she was the last one up.

I would have outlasted her if it hadn't been for Mason's blowout. On the bright side, I got to see just how chubby he is getting and had a good excuse to put on his Merry Christmas onesie.

At 8:20, Teagan finally struggled down the stairs and immediately perked up seeing the presents from Santa stacked in neat piles in front of the tree.

"Santa comed and bringed us presents!" she exclaimed as she turned the corner and the tree came into view. And he ate the milk and cookies we left for him - she was so pleased.

She had asked Santa for a teddy bear. We tried to confirm several times that a bear was indeed what she wanted from Santa, and she told everyone who asked (including Santa himself) that she wanted to teddy bear. It was so heartwarming to see her reaction when she opened it: "That's what I just needed! That's what I just needed for Christmas!" and when prodded, she said "Fank you." It was such a tender moment. And it warmed my heart that she asked for such a simple gift and was so excited to receive it. This may be the only year it happens.

We took turns opening gifts. Most of us had Teagan's help. I wish I'd wrapped empty boxes this year as all she seemed to want to do was open things and move on. We were very good this year and each got some really fun gifts that we're thankful for. Highlights include (but are not limited to)

Buddy: a textbook corresponding with a certification course he's wanted to take, Thor T-shirt, bacon and eggs Christmas ornament and DVDs (he doesn't ask for much)

Michelle: a Kitchenaid (am I the last person on earth to get one of these? Also, Brandon is upset that I haven't already put it to use), Sleep, sweet photo frame and Terry's chocolate oranges

Teagan: Lalaloopsy dolls, Play-Doh ice cream maker, Doc McStuffins dolls and doodle pad and more chocolate than she should ever eat

Mason: Air Jordan booties, bath toys, movies we wanted to see and oversized keys Teagan couldn't resist jangling in his face

Family: Killer Bunnies, an awesomely complicated game we can't wait to play with Tara & Eric and Zingo, a cute version of Bingo I've yet to win

Like I said, we were very good this year. Thanks to everyone who sent us presents!

 Chuck and Brenda gave me the gift of sleep. A beautiful sentiment indeed. I'm looking at you, Mason!

And I'm going to have to tell Santa to boycott the Dollar Store for stockings next year. I wonder if Doc McStuffins could fix this one. Diagnosis: missingpieceosis. Teagan was more than a little disappointed when she sat down to put the puzzle together. We'll have to put that one in the Big Book of Boo Boos.

We opened presents for a while, taking our time (which one member of our family - not who you'd think - thought was pretty lame) trying to drag out the fun as long as possible since there wasn't much else for us to do after we'd opened all our presents. In a stroke of genius (and/or laziness) we decided to prep breakfast last night and Brandon, for a third time, hit a homerun with his Overnight Caramel Sticky Buns. Drool. This may be a new tradition (although Brandon sorely missed his Dad's famous Christmas Morning hash browns.)

We played with the things we opened, some of us napped (again, not who you'd think) and generally enjoyed one another's company. We Skyped/FaceTimed with our families and shared some holiday laughs. Boy, we missed them. The Giffords took pity on us again this year (they had us over for Christmas Dinner in 2011 when we were alone as well) and opened their home and fondue pots to us. Incredible. The Melting Pot has nothing on Casa de Gifford. We fondued shrimp, chicken, steak, mushrooms, zucchini, hot dogs, they'd made tempura in which I slathered everything and tons of dipping sauces to tickle our tastebuds. We love them. We played a few games and stuffed ourselves with mint brownies (it's a good thing we walked over) and dragged ourselves away, since Brandon had to be at work in the morning. No Boxing Day celebrations for us.

We hugged our kids tight, cherishing our time together on this beautiful day. I thought of the Baby Jesus as I held my sweet newborn (sidenote, how long can I get away with calling him a newborn?) and thought about his potential and what my son will accomplish while he's here on earth. As we watched and read and discussed Christ's birth, Teagan kept comparing Him to Mason. While slightly sacrilegious, it was sweet to hear her talking about Mason in terms of being special and the fact that they both "comed out their mommy's tummy." Yes, I suppose that is true.

This was the first Christmas Teagan has really appreciated anything about the holiday. From Santa to presents and especially The Nativity, it's been so much fun to see Christmas through the eyes of a child and to have renewed excitement for all of the wonderful things and feelings we experience this time of year. Although I am looking forward to not hearing "Is it Christmas yet?" every morning.

This Christmas, we've made a special effort to focus on the birth of the Saviour and it has made all the difference in our little family's celebration. Thinking about His birth, life and mission has meant a deeper appreciation for Heavenly's Father's love for us and better recognition of the fact that we are all children of God and He loves us perfectly. I'm so grateful for Jesus Christ, and for Mary's sacrifice and Joseph's support in bringing Him into the world to save it. Merry CHRISTmas.

God bless us, everyone.

We traded silent nights for kids.

* I have to acknowledge that there are so many things I haven't blogged about yet, but need to start somewhere so I plan to work backwards. We'll see how it goes.*

Today is the first Christmas Eve we will spend as our own little family with a little who understands and appreciates all things Christmas. We usually go to Brandon's parents' house, but things didn't work this year. We visit my family in the summer instead of Christmas for reasons like the recent ice storm my family experience in Ontario, leaving them without power for hours (and they were the lucky ones that got the power back on). Here's the view from my parents' driveway:

We celebrated on our own in 2011, but as Teagan was just a year old, we didn't do much in the way of frills or traditions. So we wanted to deliver this year. We began with a candlelit dinner of various appetizers like egg rolls, mozzarella sticks and chicken bites. It consisted mostly of Teagan nibbling the breading off the cheese sticks, interspersed with us pleading with her to sit down (my first use of the age old "there's still time for me to call Santa and tell him not to bring gifts") and her trying to blow out the candles like it was her birthday. Not ideal, though it made a nice segue for us to talk about the fact that we celebrate Jesus' birthday at Christmastime. I found a beautiful video the church produced about keeping Christ in Christmas. We had the missionaries over for dinner and they challenged us to share something about Christ via social media, so I shared this one. My favourite quote: "We put Christ in Christmas when we give the gifts He wants us to give: the gift of ourselves." We had the missionaries over for dinner and they challenged us to share something about Christ via social media, so I shared THIS one. Beautiful.

We decided to take it to heart and write down gifts that we would give to Jesus, meaning things we would do to improve ourselves and/or help others. 

Daddy: Daddy is going to be less critical and look for the good in others.
Mummy: Mummy is going to be more patient and scream less.
Teagan: Teagan is going to listen to her Mummy and Daddy and teachers.
Mason: Mason is going to throw up less. (For the record, he's already blown it.)

We put them in a basket and set them under the tree. Sidenote: I would have loved to include more pictures, but the fact is, Teagan was only wearing "everywhere" and socks for 95% of our Christmas Eve festivities. This girl.

 

At this point, Teagan was bouncing off the walls, so we let off a little steam dancing to 'Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree' which was perfect. From there, we sat down at the piano and sang 'Jinger Bell Rock', Teagan belting out those three "words" over and over, regardless of what the words actually were. We ended with Away in a Manger, with Teagan desperately trying to watch our mouths in order to sing along. Her singing was so earnest that it melted my heart.

Since there are just four of us, we opted to play out The Nativity with our Little People Nativity instead of dressing the part. Brandon read the story from the scriptures and Teagan and I moved the people to recreate the night of Baby Jesus' birth. It went much better than anticipated - although I was sure to keep my expectations low. To drive the story home, we cuddled and watched The Nativity. We had awesome lessons in church on Sunday that encouraged us to ensure that Christ is the focal point of our Christmas celebrations. Watching videos has helped me visualize the stories and make me feel as though I'm there and I hoped that watching the videos would do the same for Teagan.

Another first: We had Teagan pick out some cookies for Santa. In a last ditch effort to score bonus points with the man in read, Teagan argued for five cookies, but we settled on three.

 

We spent quality time as a little family, we had fun, we felt the Spirit and remembered our Saviour Jesus Christ. And then we tried to put Teagan to bed, really putting my gift to Jesus (if you'll remember, I'm supposed to scream less) to the test. She woke up numerous times in tears because we "just left!" We snuggle with her when she goes to bed and have been staying until she falls asleep, but lately she has been waking up and getting upset that we aren't there. Since it's Christmas, we cracked and allowed her to sleep in our bed. She was a little too excited at the prospect and didn't actually fall asleep for quite some time. Grr. At least it made for a cute photo opportunity.

Before she joined us, I did manage to snap photos of both Teagan and Mason sleeping soundly (something I hope to make a Christmas Eve tradition), presumably with visions of sugarplums dancing in their heads. In reality, it was most likely visions of sleeping horizontally, kicking Daddy in the head repeatedly and projectile vomiting of warm milk all over Mummy, respectively. Merry Christmas indeed.

A Visit from Nicola Picola

We had the pleasure and privilege of hosting Auntie Nicola Picola for a few days before Christmas and what a fun time we had. She found some last minute tickets to Vegas and we were so glad. We tried a find a good balance of going out and doing things and holding down the couch. Poor Nicola needs about as much sleep as a newborn, so she and Mason got along swimmingly.

Teagan and Mason both took to her immediately and she was so sweet to them while she was here.

The last time we went to Pump It Up, I was ridiculously large and felt a little left out of the fun. I knew I'd need another person to come with me and Nicola was up for it, bless her heart. So this time around I got to jump and slide with my girl and enjoy some quality time we hadn't had in a few weeks. And the difference a few months makes is incredibly - Teagan had no fear...even when I did. I was really proud of her. And me, for braving slides that started at the ceiling. It. Was. Awesome.

So grateful she could come and visit and HELP. We sure do love Auntie Nicola!

'Tis the Season

We decided to stay in Vegas this Christmas and missed our families, but actually went out of our way to do some Christmas-y things as a little family unit...and Nicola. She found some last minute tickets to Vegas and we were so glad. We tried a find a good balance of going out and doing things and holding down the couch. Poor Nicola needs about as much sleep as a newborn, so she and Mason got along swimmingly. 

We bundled up and walked around our neighborhood, delivering our Christmas treats. Yes, Christmas treats. It was our first year and after the first house, realized we needed to step it up. We handed our friends a small dessert plate of chocolate-dipped Oreos and came away with a dinner plate full of a variety of delicious cookies. Next year. Maybe we'll even do a Christmas card next year. But likely not. As we wandered the neighbourhood in search of our friends and acquaintances, we admired the handful of houses that put up Christmas lights and called it a night. It was a lot of fun and a good excuse to try to assemble some wintry gear we probably won't wear again.

 

What's better than a dazzling lights display in the middle of the desert? A dazzling lights display in the middle of the desert with dessert! We visited Ethel M's Chocolate Factory and went on the "tour" - that is, walked down a longish hallway, gawking at the oompa loompas factory employees working their delicious magic - and were rewarded with a piece of chocolate at the end, which my husband and daughter proudly displayed for the photo at the end. Charmed, I'm sure.

Nicola Picola even babysat for us so we could go out on a real live date. We went to see The Hunger Games, Catching Fire and really enjoyed it. Of course, as often as we get out, I would have enjoyed a drive around the block sans children.

 

We took personality quizzes during the drive home and were somewhat surprised with the results. We were a little disappointed when we read the characters' names, but were shocked at some of the striking similarities when the characters were outlined.

Our gift from Nicola was a night on the town, and we appreciate it very much. Almost as much as Teagan and Mason appreciate theirs. 

Santa Nicola showed up with a Lalaloopsy nightgown and Play-Doh ice cream shop for Teagan...and an apology for me. And Mason will the best dressed 3-6 month old around when he fits into the darling button up shirt, jeans and suspenders Auntie Nicola brought for him. Seriously adorable. We loved her presents and we LOVED her presence.

Apparently people take their babies to see Santa and make it a yearly thing? Well, consider this one thing that Mason, our poor second child, has on his older sister. Apparently we're terrible parents for not taking her to see Santa immediately after she was born...or the year after that...or the year after that. Oops. So she met Santa at 3 and did just fine. Based on the line (on a Wednesday night, no less) going nearly all the way around the store, I could have gotten in line when she was a baby and still be there. It took us nearly two hours to get to the front and at one point, I snapped a photo of Teagan with Santa in the background, thinking that would be as close as she'd get to meeting him before the store closed. But meet him, we did, and he was very sweet.

When asked what she'd like, she told him a teddy bear. I must admit to breathing a sigh of relief that she didn't list off a squillion different things that she wanted or request anything that may assist her in shooting out her eye. I didn't get in line as a proud mother (especially when they told me I could frame this photo next to the photos from the last three years) but her humble request let me leave as one.

And bless Santa's heart, assuming that I'd been the mother I should have been and taken my oldest child to see Santa by herself in years past, insisted that he keep Mason on his weathered lap for a solo photo. Presumably to hang beside the one of just he and Teagan. Oops. Very sweet, though.

Had she had more experience with Santa, she may not have FREAKED OUT at the Ward Activity when he showed up. Within a week of visiting him at Bass Pro Shops, no less. No amount of bribery (the paper bag was chock full of treats) could make her sit quietly on the poor man's lap. She wasn't alone, though. There was a whole line of children waiting to be traumatized while their parents documented the moment. He did not get paid enough. Or at all.

While we missed our families a ton, this was the first year that Teagan was actually cognizant of the season and what was happening so it made it a little more fun for as a wee family of our own. Unless you ask Teagan.

Blessed.

I feel very fortunate to have married a man who keeps himself a worth holder of the Melchizedek Priesthood, and as such, is able to give our children priesthood blessings. Mason Brandon Richards received his name and blessing on December 1st, 2013 and we were thrilled to have Mason's Great Grandma able to attend and for his Great Uncle Steve and Grandpa Chuck to participate. It meant so much to have them there with us.

Mason looked so handsome in the wee white suit we borrowed from Tara - his oldest cousin, Jake, wore it first (and perhaps best - those poor chicken legs).

We couldn't get a decent picture of both of the kids, so we settled for a picture with both of them in it. Hopefully it gets better from here.

 

In addition to Brandon, Dad and Uncle Steve, we had our friends (from L to R) Danny Wood, Jason Gifford, Ryan (Bishop) Staten and Rob Hansen stand in the circle to bless our son. We love our ward and have made wonderful friends there. The best picture we managed to capture happened to include Teagan and her baby. Oh well.

 

The circle was small, but it was full of people we love and we were grateful for them to be able to assist us in blessing our little boy.

My uncle, the resident priesthood holder in my life until I was married, blessed me when I was a baby, and it was such a wonderful experience to have him help bless my son.

My dear, sweet Grandma who is still battling breast cancer made the long trip to visit with us for Mason's blessing and confided in me that she wasn't sure she would live to see the day her great grandson was born. And we are so glad she kept herself healthy enough and scheduled chemo and other treatments around our sweet little man. There is no one quite like my grandma - you've never met anyone so cheery and upbeat in spite of all of the trials she's seen. Love her.

Padre was kind enough to fly out for the weekend to help his son bless his son. I have so much love and respect for my father-in-law. He is a man of incredible patience, understanding and generosity. Brandon tells me every few days that he reminds himself more and more of his father and I couldn't be more pleased. There certainly are worse things.

I am so in love with my sweet little family. Some days I think two is plenty, though I know that they won't always be this little and I won't be so overwhelmed. We are still trying to find our groove, and will be for a while, but I am so happy to have such a fantastic husband and such darling children.

My dearest Mason,

You were held in the arms of your father and blessed, but I am the one who feels blessed. We prayed for you and waited for you to join our family for what seemed like forever, but ended up being a year. SO worth it, my darling boy. You are (and I have this confirmed by several sources) the most beautiful newborn I've ever seen. You are such a sweet thing and so content. I know you will do amazing things and I hope to be able to help you on your journey here on earth. I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for allowing me to be your mother here on earth and for you to be my son. So far I know a lot about girl stuff, so please be patient with me as I learn the ropes of raising a boy. Thank you for being such a source of love in our home.
Love you forever,

Mum

Thirty and Dirty and Surviving

Jennifer Garner's adage of "thirty and flirty and thriving" from the movie 13 Going on 30 doesn't really apply in my case. My birthday (November 23rd) started off on a crappy note. Literally. Brandon woke me up at 2:30 in the morning covered in our 3 week old son's poo, needing my help to get it out of his clothes, the changing table, the carpet, the rocking chair...you get the idea. My 31st year can only get better from here, right?
Brandon insisted I sleep in, so I pulled Mason into bed with me since he seems to sleep better that way in the mornings and tried to get some extra sleep, in spite of Teagan bursting in (too fast for Buddy) 3 times in 30 minutes, whining and crying about the silliest of things.

I was treated to a delicious breakfast and a shower as long as I wanted - a present in itself. Then it was off to Target to use some coupons that were expiring and shop for my birthday present. I had no idea what he wanted to get for me, but he took me the long way to the Christmas section and told me to choose a tree. May seem like a strange gift to you, but you probably don't have a Charlie Brown looking, 6 feet of toilet brush fake tree you paid $20 for at Wal-Mart 7 years ago. I was thrilled.

It rained for the second day in a row - and not typical Las Vegas rain, a 10 minute torrential downpour, but a constant drizzle. It was awesome. I had an excuse to wear my rain boots and it was such a change of pace from the constant heat and sun (boo hoo, I know!) that it made my birthday more enjoyable.

 

We headed for Firehouse Subs to claim the free sub that was rightfully mine for being born on November 23rd. Luckily, my birthday fell on a weekend, so with Brandon's combo Teagan ate for 99c. Or rather, didn't eat for 99c - she was too busy riding the dalmatian statue. 

 

I brought a bottle of expressed milk for Mason and didn't bring enough. He began to scream and Teagan started to run, so Brandon decided to move on to the next phase of Birthday Freebies - Tropical Smoothie Cafe - without the kids.

What's better than getting a free smoothie on your birthday? Getting a free smoothie by yourself, leaving your husband with two kids screaming at the top of their lungs. However someone, who will remain nameless, batted her eyelashes and asked oh-so-politely for some of Mummy's birthday smoothie. If you look past the scary hair, she really is too cute to resist. I ended up getting some of it, after we'd frozen and thawed it numerous times because I'd forgotten about it.
I requested that we decorate for Christmas, because I don't think the season lasts long enough (all due respect to Thanksgiving, I think it should be moved - Canada has it right.) Three large tubs brimming with Christmas trinkets + one rambunctious toddler whose world has been recently rocked = the holidays throwing up on my living room. As Teagan stepped on her squillionth ornament and dropped the container of jingle bells for the hundredth time, I started to think about my "new normal" as my sister-in-law, who also had her second child recently, put it.

When I had the time to sit down, think about and behold my new normal, I became overwhelmed and had a bit of an emotional breakdown. That time was consumed by nursing the baby, and I thus came to the overly dramatic conclusion that I'd never have a minute to myself again in this lifetime. (Looking back after a day or two, I realize that it isn't entirely true, and I won't always have a newborn, but in the moment I couldn't help but feel depressed.) I sat, nursing Mason and surveyed all that was mine - every surface in our kitchen littered with dirty dishes, "birthday cakes" made of tea towels and sponges dotting the kitchen floor amongst yesterday's crumbs, pillows everywhere but on the couches, baby clothes and big girl underwear strewn about the living room, and everything we have to do with Christmas laying on what I think was the carpet - hard to say, since I couldn't see any. I scanned the lower half of my house (it's all one big space) and imagined 100 different projects I'd like to tackle but will never have the time to do. Feeling like I'd never be myself again and feeling like I'd never have a clean or even tidy house again, I wept. You may laugh, but I find it difficult to function when things are a mess. Why did I have children, you ask? Well, to this point I'd been able to control it - or at least clean up after it. But it's gotten away from me and I am going to have to learn to let some things go if I have a prayer of remaining sane. Tears rolled down my cheeks as one child screamed in my arms and the other waved random objects in my face, wondering if I was cut out for motherhood at all.
My family was at our cousin's wedding in Canada and thoughtfully requested to Skype with us. (Thoughtfully requested meaning Nicola texting "SKYPE".) I sat, holding Mason, looking as beautiful as I'd looked in weeks. In that my hair was washed, but not dried or styled and I was wearing tinted moisturizer in an attempt to cover what remains of the acne I developed while pregnant (but it couldn't hide my hideous cold sore) and mascara. My family, in between the ceremony and reception, looked stunning. Hair beautifully coiffed, makeup perfectly applied and dressed to the nines. The comparison was laughable. Well, it is now. At the time it nearly made me burst into new tears.

Had I enjoyed the fun and fancy free time I had while I had it? Because we've had to try for a while with both of our children, sometimes I was too focused on not having children and feeling guilty when I should have made more of an effort to appreciate the childless time I was given. Don't get me wrong, I was and am so thrilled to be a mother - I'm just acclimating to my new normal and realizing that there's a lot less room to be selfish with your time when you have two children. Two children who at the end of our conversation about my family heading off to dance the night away began to scream in unison. We could all only laugh as we hung up.

After calming the baby, I tried to put him down but he wouldn't stop crying unless he was being held. I'd had so many people on Facebook wish me a happy birthday, hoping that I'd get lots of snuggles and enjoy my new baby, but this wasn't how I'd imagined it.

It was a few minutes to bedtime and I realized we hadn't fed Teagan, so secured my Mother of the Year nomination and gave her cereal for dinner. I decided to eat cereal myself, since I was too lazy for anything else. I ate a few bites and got distracted by someone screaming and forgot about it, resulting in soggy cereal. Is THIS my new normal?

While Brandon put Teagan to bed, I changed "the easy one" while our daughter screamed bloody murder upstairs. By this point I had a pounding headache - did I mention I was already sick? - and was about to cry again. Then it occurred to me that at least Mason hadn't peed on me. While basking in the silver lining I'd found, he let 'er rip and exploded poo into the new diaper I hadn't fastened yet. Laughing instead of crying, I got him dressed and handed him to my poor husband who'd tried to make my birthday fun in spite of sickness and a newborn and Mason threw up what seemed like everything he'd consumed that day all over him. I took the baby while Brandon cleaned up and he just looked up at me and stared at me like he hasn't before and then slept soundly in my arms for over an hour - and I enjoyed every minute. He's becoming more aware of the world around him and while I know he still can't see much, I feel like we've made eye contact a few times and there's nothing like looking into the eyes of a newborn baby...when they're both going in the same direction.

I'm thirty. I may not be flirty or thriving, but I'm a mother of two and will do my best to live up to the expectations Heavenly has put on me, entrusting me with these two precious souls. I wanted so badly to be a mother and if that means I watch a little less adult TV and spend less time cleaning or surfing the net, then I'm all the better for it. I had plenty of time to myself and now I owe it to these children and my husband to be focused on them (with a little time to myself or with friends every now and again). I haven't acclimated yet, and won't for a while. It still makes my teeth clench when Teagan dumps out the drawer of tea towels I've just folded neatly and it frustrates me when my son wants to be fed every hour and I think I'm going to lose my mind when they both cry at the same time, but I can do this. I will survive.