No! MY Michelle.

I stole a line from my two year old this evening. When she wants to make sure you know that something is hers and not yours, she pulls it close to her body and declares, "NO! MY Teagan."

Buddy and I were once again in the throes of the age old debate of who eats what and when. (For previous instances, please refer back to It's Happening Again, and Quotable Quotes and The Last Kiss.)

Upon discovering a bag of Ghirardelli chocolates in the pantry, Buddy rightly inquired as to from whence they came (I don't buy treats a lot). I told him my friend, Hillary, gave them to me for my birthday. 

"Well, I think Hillary would want me to have one."

"Um, Hillary gave them to me, so she surrendered her right to decide who eats them."

"SEE?!" pointing to the intact seal at the top of the bag. "Point proven. Unopened after more than a month. If it were up to you, these would still be here on your birthday next year."

"I like to savour my treats. Sue me. Actually, just have one. And I'll have TWO." 

I showed him.

Surprise! We'll be Home for Christmas!

Remember when Brandon was supposed to work Christmas Eve and therefore wasn't going to be able to go home to join every other member of his immediate family that were getting together to celebrate? Well, apparently everyone felt so badly for him that they campaigned for him to have the day off. We found out just a couple of weeks away from Christmas and in talking to his sister, Tara, decided that we should surprise the rest of the family. 

You're probably thinking, Hold on a second, Michelle, didn't you get a trip to Disneyland under the premise that you weren't going to be there for Christmas? Thank you for reminding me. Yes, our trip to the happiest place on earth was ridden with guilt, as we had found out a few days before that we'd be able to make it to Moscow. And bless her heart, Brenda had already mentioned our trip in their Christmas letter so everyone we saw at church mentioned the fact that we conned the parents into the trip. I like to think it wasn't a con. Everything was planned before we knew. And we did manage to have some fun in spite of the guilt, thank you very much.

It got a bit tricky when we chatted with everyone and pretended to be devastated that we wouldn't be able to make it. But we managed to keep it together and everyone was floored. Tara planned a party at her parents' house so everyone would be together and said she'd sent Eric to Spokane to pick up a Christmas present. Eric and Jake picked us up at the airport and took us straight there.
Sidenote: Brandon had his second celebrity sighting at the airport in a couple of months. To be specific, his second NBA celebrity sighting. The first was Allen Iverson at Carl's Jr. in the Las Vegas airport. Brandon said he didn't look happy, so he didn't brave talking to him. The second was at the Salt Lake airport and guess who noticed him first? That's right. I picked out a former NBA star. Granted, at 7'6" he was hard to miss. Yep, Mr. Shawn Bradley. I had taken a few photos from afar, then channeled my friend Kaylinn and made Brandon get as close to him as possible. He was busy chatting with other people so he didn't bother him, instead Brandon looked as nonchalant as possible and Teagan decided to pick her nose to add to the air of indifference.

We debated about how to pull it off the whole way and each plan hinged on whether Teagan was going to be cooperative or a total pill as she'd proven to be most of the drive. She got a quick nap in and was in fairly good spirits by the time we arrived. So, we set her up on the porch, rang the doorbell and ran to hide. Our brother-in-law answered the door and said "Hi Teagan!" Brenda said that she was going through all the Teagans she knew in her head and started to run to the door when she realized it was Lucky #13 (she's the 13th grandchild) at the door all by her lonesome. After waiting an uncomfortable amount of time, we popped out and wished everyone a Merry Christmas. Tears and hugs, tears and hugs. It was awesome. Sadly, Tiff, Shawn and their families weren't there, but it gave us more surprise opportunities.
We used Teagan again and just left her running around downstairs with the 9 other kids while Brandon and I waited upstairs, timing how long it took for Tiff to notice the addition. She surprised us and noticed her almost immediately and we got to pop out and say hello. When Shawn got there, we just tried to blend in with everyone else and see how long it took. He did a double take when he turned to Brandon to start a conversation - it was pretty funny.
Everyone was so excited to have us there (or they made us feel that way, anyway) running around changing sheets and moving suitcases to make room for us. We dug right into ice cream and raided the dessert table - one of the highlights of Christmas :)

 

Another highlight was the snow. It's been a while since either of us have seen snow, and I can guarantee Teagan doesn't remember when she saw it last. This was the first time she'd been old enough to actually enjoy it. So we dusted off the snowsuit we'd left in Moscow and borrowed some snow boots from her cousin, Camden, and sent her out into the fray. Her first reaction to snow? Eat it. Just eat it. She couldn't get enough - and there was plenty. She started out eating it off her mittens and soon realized that particular vehicle wasn't getting the white stuff into her gob nearly fast enough. She got on her hands and knees and buried her face in the snow and ate her way out. It was freshly fallen and the Richards now have no pets to speak of (RIP Buffy & Chester) so none of it was yellow. I'd say her first real frolic in the snow was a success. And she was plenty hydrated by the end of it, so there was that.

Teagan wasn't the only one who enjoyed some fun in the snow. They didn't eat it by the mittenful, but Shawn and Brandon found other ways to have a good time. What started out as me on assignment from their mother to get a photo of them turned into a full blown photo shoot. From a 10 paces duel to snow angels to bottoming out on the swing, they were an absolute riot. When these two get together, you can't help but laugh.

We piled into a convoy of vehicles and headed to Lewiston for a buffet and a tour of the lights in a nearby park. The lights were amazing. They had an old train draped in thousands of lights, tons of trees in every conceivable colour, dancing penguins, an igloo, giant gingerbread men and the hit of the evening: a dance floor connected to lights surrounded by heated benches. Everybody wins. The kids danced the night away, stomping on sections of flooring that made the lights blink on and off and we sat roasting our rumps and laughing at them. That is, until the theme from A Charlie Brown Christmas came on and Manda, Buddy and I couldn't resist hopping up and doing some of the classic moves. So much family fun.

New on the docket for Christmas Eve this year after the traditional (and delicious) steak dinner was a talent show. Piano playing, singing and dancing - it was so cute. Then, as is Richards tradition, the kids acted out The Nativity while Grandpa read from Luke. Casting was inspired and last year's "babies" were cast as sheep. Three sheep two and under were quite a handful for the poor shepherds. I think the donkey actually stepped in at one point to help.

One of the sheep embraced her Las Vegas roots and posed for a picture that I couldn't have planned. Too funny.

On to Christmas morning...Despite the fact that we surprised them and the fact that we'd already received our Christmas money, Chuck & Brenda went out of their way (that is, ran around like chickens with their heads cut off) for days, picking up presents for us to open and make us feel even more special on Christmas morning. I know, right? It was wonderful. Also madness. Five families opening gifts at the same time, it was the best kind of craziness.
Unfortunately, we had to fly out that evening in order for Brandon to get back to work on the 26th, but we had a wonderful time and owe so much to the Richards for making it a Christmas to remember and a surprise never to forget.

Happiest {Consolation} Place on Earth

Brandon drew the short straw and wound up having to work on Christmas Eve and Boxing Day (although apparently that isn't a holiday here) so we weren't going to be able to make it to Moscow to spend Christmas with his family. His whole family. His siblings are all married, so have in-law schedules to adhere to as well, and they were all going to be there this year. Boy, did we feel like horses' patoots. As a "Sorry you won't be able to make it" consolation prize, Chuck & Brenda treated us to a Disneyland trip! Aww, shucks.
We rented a tricked out mini-van and drove down to LAX to pick them up from the airport. I had borrowed multiple Disney movies for Teagan to watch on the drive down and become acquainted with the magic. Instead, she insisted on (read: screamed for) Dora. Silly goose. Sidenote: I had requested a Disneyland Sing-Along from the library and it didn't get there in time for our trip. We picked it up when we got home and Teagan watched it no less than twice a day for the 3 weeks we had it. She recognized all the characters and some of the rides and absolutely loved it. Almost as much as she loved having a DVD player in the van. She looks up at the the roof of our car and asks for movies ("noovies") now. Poor thing.

We had a late night that night, so thought Teagan would crash and sleep like a log, the way she does at home. Boy, we were wrong. She was awake more than she slept and made sure we didn't sleep either, crawling all over me when I tried to have her sleep in bed with me. We were sharing a suite with Brandon's parents and we'd taken the room with 2 queen beds, as it seemed to have more room for the playpen. But Chuck and Brenda were gracious enough to give up the King room so Teagan could have a room to herself in hopes that she'd sleep better. Sheesh, what a diva. So, bless their hearts, we shared a room and all slept much better for the remainder of the trip.

 

We were ready for a day 'o' fun, despite the miserable night's sleep. We met all sorts of interesting people on the bus ride over, most from Australia. I guess they have their summer break now. Sidenote: I have confirmed that chivalry is indeed dead. We rode the shuttle back and forth a lot, and at times chivalry seemed to be thriving, then went on life support, and by the time we rode the bus for the last time, I called time of death. I was surprised when the driver stopped to let us on, as the bus already seemed full to capacity. With no open seats, Brandon's parents stood, holding on to poles, I stood with the stroller, and Brandon (again) drew the short straw and had to hold Teagan. I took a quick scan of the bus and understood why many of the people didn't get up to offer them a seat. Until I got to the back and a gaggle of spry, young men sat laughing about the events of their day. I did my best to reserve judgment until we disembarked, thinking that perhaps they were physically handicapped in some way. No limps, no crutches, no wheelchairs or any other indication that they weren't perfectly healthy and would have had a much easier time standing than a man wrestling 30 pounds of exhausted toddler. C'est la vie, I suppose.

Disney characters weren't the only familiar faces we ran into at The Land. Brandon looked up as we were in line for Pirates of the Caribbean and noticed an old friend. Well, the distant cousin of our old friend. They seem to find us everywhere.

Just when you thought Disneyland was the happiest it could be, they decorated for Christmas. Brenda has a great love for Disneyland to begin with. Add Christmas lights and Santa hats and she's a giddy schoolgirl. It was fun to watch. It really is an amazing time to visit. Merry Christmas indeed.

Brenda and I fixated on some toddler princess dolls that we both found ADORABLE. She agonized over which one to choose every time we passed a store. She finally settled on Rapunzel and I don't believe she's ever looked back. We picked one up for Teagan for Christmas - she LOVES Tangled. And while I hadn't seen Brave, I thought Merida was the cutest thing I'd ever laid eyes on. I refrained, but it took every ounce of self restraint I possessed. Look at that smirk!

Fast passes were out by the time we arrived at the brand new Cars Land, and we didn't want to spend hours waiting to ride the new Cars inspired ride, we instead opted to watch from the sidelines. It really was amazing. They recreated Radiator Springs PERFECTLY. Like you would expect anything less. It was so fun to walk around and take in the scenery. So clever.

Disneyland's Christmas Parade. The memories may fade, but the neck cramps will stay with Brandon for a LONG time :) The poor man held his daughter aloft for more than half an hour while she was captivated by the sights and sounds of every Disney character she knew and loved waltzing down the street in front of her. I spent almost as much time watching her as I did the parade. She was calling characters' names and waving to them. "Hi Pooh! Hi Nanarella! Hi Ninnie Mouse! Hi Nickey Mouse!" Absolutely precious.

Sure, she could wave at them from a distance, but when it came to getting up close and personal with some of her favourites, she morphed into a whiny, clingy, very LOUD mess. Bless her heart, Minnie tried, but Teagan just wasn't having it. But immediately after we started to move on and the next little boy in line marched up and hugged Minnie, it was all "Bye Ninnie Mounse! Love you!" Too little, too late, my dear.

Our friend, Kaylinn, can tell you horror stories from her days as a character escort - not sure if that's the right term - and just from seeing the hoards of children waiting to meet them and accosting them on their way to their break. Keep that in mind when I tell you that I tried not to be obnoxious to the princesses. We happened to be strolling down a little path from Fantasyland and were directly across from the Princess Walk (where you line up to meet 3 princesses) when the shift changed and said princesses literally passed by us several feet away. We didn't shout their name, we didn't ask for a photo because we knew that they'd been dealing with that for hours. But what wonderful girls, Tiana (didn't get my camera out in time) and Aurora were very sweet to wave politely at Teagan as they made their way to the backlot and Jasmine (need to write a letter) stopped for a few minutes and talked to Teagan, giving her a high five and dealing very nicely with her not responding at all. She'll be upset when I tell her this story in a few years when the obsession with princesses has reached its peak. Jasmine went above and beyond to make Teagan's experience magical - and if she hadn't been 2 and in desperate need of a nap, it might have worked.

Teagan surprised me by how well she tolerated so much time sitting in the stroller and getting in and out. Of course, things were much easier with Grandma's phone. The little stinker hardly said "Grandma" without "phone" appearing in the same sentence. And Grandma delivered every time - she had to say no for years with her own, so now she gets to be the good guy :) Teagan loved the rides and went on a lot - it helps to be over 3 feet when you're 2. I was nervous about Pirates of the Caribbean, with the rollercoaster-like drops (Brandon will laugh when he reads that - I'm kind of a ride wimp) but she didn't make a peep. It was pitch black, so she could have been paralyzed with fear but I couldn't tell. We'll say she smiled. She and Grandma could have ridden Small World all day long, but we only did it twice. The Saturday we were there was MADNESS and even Small World's line was almost an hour long. We didn't stay long that day. Between Teagan's cold and feeling like a sardine who'd been hit by a truck (meaning it was too crowded and we were exhausted) we called it a day and relaxed at the hotel.

One of the things Brandon insisted on showing his parents (and rightly so) was World of Colour. We had been to Disneyland as a family in the summer of 2010, mere weeks before its debut. We got to see it with Mark and Kaylinn in the summer of 2011 (man, we're spoiled!) and loved it. We got fast passes and lined up almost an hour before the show to make sure we had good seats...okay, and to rest. It was incredible. It'll be hard to enjoy the Bellagio fountains after this. They loved it, we loved it, Teagan loved the first few minutes. I downloaded a Disneyland app that allows you to take a virtual tour of Disneyland and California Adventure, and you can line up videos to make your own World of Colour show. She loves it. It was fun to see her actually enjoying things this time around. I'm making sure to document everything because it will be a LONG time before she sees it again :)

To sum up, if you can't go home for Christmas, go to Disneyland instead. Thanks, Mom & Dad for a wonderful time!

Out of the Mouths of Husbands

Those of you who know my husband know that he's funny. Ridiculously funny. Like, I-wish-you-wouldn't-try-to-make-me-laugh-while-I'm-trying-to-be-upset-with-you funny. I've taken to writing down some of his one-liners and witty quips because I know I'll regret it if I don't. I hope you enjoy his antics as much as I do...when I'm not making a concerted effort to be angry.

"Just think how much money Rapunzel could have gotten if she'd donated her hair to Locks of Love!" - Buddy
"You don't get paid - it's a donation." - Michelle
"Well, what DO you get then?" - Buddy
"A good feeling and a free haircut." - Michelle
"Well he did do a pretty good job with a piece of glass." - Buddy

(To the tune of 'Do You Hear What I Hear?')
Said the Honey Mustard Pringle to my mouth,
Please do not eat me! (Please do not eat me!)
I have so much to live for! (I have so much to live for!)


"Which one married Lamar Odom? And who dated Reggie Bush? Isn't there another one?" (He can only tell the Kardashians apart by their famous athlete counterparts.)

"Swiper's the worst thief ever. He doesn't even keep what he steals!"

"I don't think I'm going to make it through this movie." (eyes closed, laying on the couch turned away from the screen 15 minutes in.)

"Dora succeeds at everything she does. One day life is going to teach her a lesson and failure is going to hit her like a ton of bricks."

"How did Bugs Bunny get top billing over Michael Jordan in [Space Jam]?"

Most people keep track of funny things their kids say. Teagan still doesn't say much so until she does, he's keeping me hopping.

Movie Night: Before and After

Santa delivered and we're enjoying the view. Now I'm content watching a DVD in widescreen, as opposed to earlier this month when the movie would disappear if not viewed in fullscreen mode.

It's a shame that so much of the poor TV's time and potential is wasted on episodes of Dora, but I find I'm even enjoying those. Thanks, Santa!

The curtains were hung by the window with care.

I'm a little late on the whole chevron craze, but I'm SO excited about my new living room/kitchen decor that I had to share. I have a fairy godmother-in-law who is an incredible seamstress. She put together grommet curtains for Teagan's bedroom and I absolutely loved them. So I gave her a sob story about absolutely no privacy downstairs at our house, with no window coverings on our bay windows in the kitchen and ugly, let-in-all-the-light-during-the-day and on-display-for-your-neighbours-at-night blinds in the living room. Next thing I know, she's ordering swatches and having me choose the material for full length curtains for the kitchen. HOORAY! 

The day they arrived, I practically threw them at Buddy to hang as soon as he got home. He abhors hanging anything. Especially anything weight-bearing. He eyeballs our hanging shelves every day, claiming that they're inching away from the wall and everything could come down any minute now. He's so cute. Usually I give him 24 hours to prep himself for the task, but I couldn't do that for this particular project, so up they went. And they look awesome, if I do say so myself. Isn't Mama Richards impressive?

 

Brandon didn't admire his handiwork as much as said a silent prayer that they wouldn't fall down. Something about a stud in the middle and be careful when you open and close them. Bless his worrying little heart.

 

As if that wasn't enough, I conned her into "teaching me how to sew pillow covers" which really translated to sitting next to her while she whipped them up. I had intended for us to make one together so I could do the rest myself later, but we both knew that wasn't going to happen, so she finished all six for me in record time. She tried to teach me a few things and I admire her for that, but I'm still confident I couldn't sew my way out of a paper bag. Into a paper bag? Regardless - I can't sew. I blind stitched three of the pillows myself, which look nothing like the blind stitch Brenda did on the other three in half the time. I just received grey & yellow fabric in the mail to cover two more pillows and tie everything in together, but I think I gave myself too much credit when I ordered it.

Until I can muster the courage, I'm content to admire my MIL's handiwork. Thank you fairy godmother-in-law! I'm a lucky lady.

Stables, Sweatpants and Surprises

I may have whined a little too much about my birthday being the day after Thanksgiving and hence not being a very special occasion. I sat down with Brandon after getting an invite to friend's birthday party just a few days after my birthday passed with a a few calls from family and some Facebook posts from friends. I may have begged (with tears glistening in my eyes) Brandon to make my 30th birthday next year a big deal. Yes, I'm a brat and insist that birthdays be a special day. I've been known to exclaim "Happy Birthday" every time I see someone on their birthday. I think it got old for my coworkers when they passed me in the hallway 30 times a day. I had to reign in my excitement.

He told me he would be sure to make my 30th birthday a big deal, regardless of where it fell around Thanksgiving, and we dropped the subject.

Our great friends, Natalie and Jason, had invited us over to play games on Friday, November 30th. I donned my sweatpants, anticipating us being there into the wee hours, as we usually are. I ignored Buddy's advice to "keep that shirt on, it looks nice" and opted for comfort. We walked over - walking the two blocks to the Giffords is the only exercise we seem to get. We barged in with our bags 'o' stuff  with games to play and Teagan's effects - she sleeps in a Pack 'n' Play in their bedroom which is absolutely perfect. I paused to admire Natalie's Willow Tree nativity complete with backlighting in a little nook between the kitchen and the living room. I blathered on and on about the lighting, the pieces, the perfection that it was in that particular part of the house. All of a sudden, "SURPRISE!" rang out from behind me. I had been so consumed by the nativity that I hadn't noticed the nearly 30 people standing in the living room a few feet away. (Needless to say, it made me question whether or not I'd notice a burglar in enough time to do anything about it!) Apparently the awkwardness had gone on for so long that people weren't sure what to do, so Jason silently signaled to 3 and the surprise erupted. I was shocked that with more than half of those in attendance being children, they had managed to be absolutely silent. I was completely blindsided. As seen in the photos.

My first response after jumping and gasping was "I'm wearing SWEATPANTS. Why didn't you MAKE me change?!" A thank you would have been better, but that came later. Brandon had arranged everything well before I threw a tantrum (I'm not too old for those quite yet), complete with cake, ice cream and snacks. What a man, what a man, what a mighty fine man. That didn't stop me from continuing to punch him for allowing my wardrobe choice and blocking me from blowing out the candle.

A special thanks to the Giffords for hosting at their beyond beautiful home, and the Headlees, Parkinsons, Pecks, Shumways, Tiffani and Yaggis for making it a birthday to remember. I can't thank Brandon enough for making me feel so special. His first question on the way home: "Do I still have to make next year a big deal?" Love him.

Dancing in the Dark.

Richards. Single Ladies. Glowsticks. Three ingredients for a fun Sunday evening.

We've been sitting around, watching a lot of TV lately and we wanted to get out of our little funk. So I turned off the family movie, turned off all the lights and told Brandon & Teagan to put their coats on and step outside. I handed them each a glowstick and we danced around the backyard in the darkness, raising neighbours' eyebrows, no doubt. We made them into rings and tossed them to eachother, we sent them rolling down the slide and threw them in the air as high as we could. I couldn't capture any decent pictures of the fun, except a glimpse of a glowstick under our Christmas tree in the window. It occurred to me as my fingers began to freeze that we could make it just as dark inside our house and we could have stayed there and had just as much fun. (Still blonde.)

So we marched back inside, cranked Beyonce's "Single Ladies" and boogied around the living room with our dollar store glowsticks. There may be only three of us and sometimes I envy those families with a bunch of children to say funny things, play around together and generally be creative and hilarious. But this evening was one of those times that the three of us laughed and played and enjoyed one another's company as much as we ever have. Love my little family...and their sweet dance moves.