Hallelujah.

After a year and a half of unsuccessful attempts to conceive...I'M PREGNANT!

That feels so good to write. In August of 2008, Brandon and I felt that we were ready to have a baby. Heavenly Father apparently had a different idea! I'm not sure what it was that I needed to learn, but I certainly didn't learn patience or humility! With each month that passed, learning that I was not pregnant, I became more and more sensitive about other people complaining about their children or pregnancies, making me not too much fun at church functions where everyone has at least one or three children to cry about. It seemed like each week at church, someone mentioned motherhood and how it's the greatest calling a woman can have. Even in Primary, the presidency talks about how buys mothers are and how they need to take time for themselves. I know in my heart that no one meant any cruelty by what they said, but I couldn't help but be hurt that I didn't feel valued just because I'm not a mother yet - through no fault of my own. I believe I will be much more sensitive to other people's situations (ie. not being married, not having children) movoing forward as a result of our struggle. Maybe that's what I needed to learn?

But, to make a short story long, WE'RE HAVING A BABY! I can't describe the emotions I'm feeling at the moment. We've been keeping pretty close tabs on my cycles, so I took a pregnancy test on Saturday night even before the day my period should have started. On Sunday morning I took another test, to be certain. We still didn't want to get our hopes up over a false positive, so neither of us really celebrated at the results of either test, just in case. We planned to make an appointment with Dr. Pollock, my OB/GYN, for Tuesday to confirm. Enter the worst abdominal pain I've ever experienced. On Saturday night and the better part of Sunday, I was doubled over in pain, so bad at times I was reduced to tears. At midnight on Sunday/Monday, Brandon could not stand seeing me in pain any longer. He'd given me a priesthood blessing (I'm so glad I married a worthy priesthood holder) but was determined to take me to the Emergency Room. Urine samples and blood tests confirmed that I was pregnant, but so early on that the baby didn't appear in an ultrasound. however, it did reveal an abnormal amount of fluid around one of my ovaries, leaving the doctor unable to rule out an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy. Yikes! We were there until 4:00 AM (luckily it was Presidents' Day so I got to sleep most of the day away), following an IV drip and a pelvic exam, still no definite cause of my cramping besides a potential yeast infection and UTI. The ER? Not the greatest place to find out you're pregnant :)

So, we set up an appointment with Dr. Pollock for this morning. The nurse came in with a gift bag for expectant mothers, but upon hearing that an ecptopic pregnancy was a possibility, trying to be sensitive, she offered to hold onto it until it had been confirmed. Dr. Pollock met with us and explained that the cramping is perfectly normal in the first trimester and that I didn't give him cause to worry about me more than anyone else. PHEW! So we have an ultrasound scheduled for 2 weeks from now, where hopefully we'll get to see the baby! And I got my gift bag back - the nurse chased us down the hall to give it to us :)

We had called Chuck multiple times this weekend for advice and support. It's wonderful to have him as such a fantastic resource. With Chuck in the know, we felt it would be good to bring all our parents in on the situation. So I tol Mum, who was thrilled and she told Dad - who threatened to beat Brandon up, as I'm his "Little Girl". He's kidding to an extent, but I know he's concerned about how we'll support ourselves and a baby. Then Brandon told Brenda, who was ecstatic, so we had all the parents in the loop, praying and helping. We know it's early (4 1/2 weeks) but felt they needed to know and be involved.

We are both over the moon excited about this news. The timing will be a bit tricky, what with us being in Kentucky until October, when we suspect the baby will be due. Should be fun! What an adventure!